I Kicked the Habit

Thou shalt not be self-righteous!

In the fifth grade, I did not murder anyone. I also did not commit adultery or covet my neighbor’s wife or his ox or his ass—all because Mrs. Schmeets had the Ten Commandments posted above the pencil sharpener in her classroom. I cannot even count the number of times that framed poster of Old Testament rules kept me from using a freshly sharpened pencil…